I NEED A CHEERLEADER…NOT A “YES” MAN.



The people who you should keep around are the ones who are your cheerleaders even if they don't always agree with the team you're on. 

BUT...there is a difference between having people in your circle that are "yes men" and people that support what you do.  So errrr---ummm--- let's break down the difference.

If you have a true friend, they will be a voice of reason when you are too far in your emotions to think rationally about a situation.  They don't tell you what you want to hear for the sake of keeping you satisfied.  They side with truth and their beliefs according to what is best for you.  Now, some people don't have a clue what's really best for you, but that's when they keep it real with you and acknowledge that.  The "know-it-all" folks can be just as bad as the ones with agendas.  Many times they are one and the same.


Speaking of agendas...a friend who is supportive will not put their own wants before giving you advice that is best for you. We all know people who operate like that where the solution they give you magically becomes something they will be happy with too.  I don't care how long you've known the person or if they are a family member...it doesn't matter.  If someone constantly gives you advice that resembles what they want you to do rather than what you should be doing, you need to call them out on it.

I know I have had to check myself when it came to the way I would deal with another person.  I have been a "yes man" sometimes.  Mainly because of wanting to be supportive and someone that others felt like they could really talk to.  But I know I would want my circle to be real with me, so if I can't do the same...I deserve a crowd of "yes men" around me.


I emphasize the point of this because there are many miserable-minded people in the world who may care for you but they operate by trying to manipulate situations and people close to them.  There are also people in the world who could give a damn about your issues so it's easy to give you a half-hearted response when you're looking for advice or a voice of reason. 


More than all that though...what you surround yourself with will start to become the tone of your mindset.  I promise you - as many people that believe they know right from wrong...if you stick around enough pessimistic people, enough hypocrites, liars, thieves, or any of the like...YOU GROW LESS SENSITIVE TO THAT BEHAVIOR.   And yes...you will probably begin to mirror it.

Cheerleaders give you a mental boost and encourage you to stay on your toes where you are constantly evolving.  They are not threatened by your moves.  If anything your moves inspire them to get moving as well.  We all need them because without them we can find ourselves depressed or without motivation.  

Alright, I think I've made my point...I'll shut up for now.

WHAT’S YOUR PRIORITY SINGLE LADY??? (PART ONE)


I'VE BEEN AWAY FOR A WHILE...BUT NOW I'M BACK MORE LONG-WINDED THAN EVER!!! (HEE-HEE-HA-HA)

Dear Single Woman,

It's cute to say you're "grinding"...it's really admirable to yip yap about the fact that you're doing "you" (whatever that is), when all you're really doing in your mind is trying to carry the 1 and push the equals sign on the calculator about who will sweep you off your feet and marry you.

MY DIARY ENTRY: I WAS DEFINITELY THAT CHICK. CIRCA 2009, I WAS PROPOSED TO AS I WAS ACTUALLY TRYING TO BREAK UP WITH MY EX-BOYFRIEND. I FORCED THE MOMENT BECAUSE I FINALLY HEARD THOSE WORDS UTTERED I HAD WAITED A LIFETIME FOR. BUT THE PERSON I WAS WITH PROPOSED ON ONE HELL OF A WHELM. NO RING. NO PLANNED APPROACH TO MAKE IT EVEN REMOTELY ROMANTIC. HE JUST GOT ON HIS KNEES AS ONE LAST ATTEMPT TO SHUT ME UP ABOUT HOW AWFUL OUR RELATIONSHIP WAS. AND I SAID YES. AND WHY? BECAUSE I FELT LIKE I HAD PAID MY DUES.

Most of us...either mid/late 20's...30's...and 40's women at some point begin to evaluate our personal lives, and if we're still unwed, we definitely start having those talks with our closest confidants about the pursuit of Mr. Right.

Problem is, MANY OF US DO NOT KNOW WHAT WE WANT OUT OF A HUBBY!!! Yeah, we claim that we want an honest, respectful, romantic man that has financial stability. But let me tell you what happens in the middle of that sentence before we finish the rest of that ball-faced lie...

WE CONTINUE TO INVEST UNDESERVED TIME TOWARD ALL THE MR. WRONGS BECAUSE WE'RE TOO AFRAID TO SIT THE HELL DOWN FOR A HOT SECOND, CHILL AND WAIT FOR MR. RIGHT THAT IS OUT THERE TO COME GET US.

How many of yall ladybugs out there KNOOOOOOOW deep down that you have a complete LAME, LOSER, LOW-LIFE on speed-dial and need to house down a whole bottle of Moscato (or if you have a powerful stomach...some Captain Morgan - I don't drink anymore BTW...) just so you can entertain him and forget about how pathetic the situation is?

And after that episode ends...you're either repentin' to Jesus or feeling emptier than before you saw him because you know that this isn't in agreement with your conscience.

This is what I KNOW ladybugs. When you develop a true purpose and strive to better your life and focus on the contribution you want to make in the world, in the lives of the people you love, and frankly, find something to do with yourself --- HE WILL COME AND FIND YOU!!!!

On top of that, your surroundings will change for the better. When you have more focus and purpose in your life, you notice that more trivial things that could take up time in your life get pushed further and further to the BACK of your mind. It's called developing standards for your life.

One beautiful thing about being single is that you have time to think independently with fewer emotional distractions. Take that time to KNOW YOURSELF and LOVE YOURSELF and TAKE PRIDE IN WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU WANT. Trust me. He'll come once you stop trippin' about it.

LinkWithin

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
 
DOODLEBUG DIARIES® © 2014 | Designed by Rumah Dijual, in collaboration with Buy Dofollow Links! =) , Lastminutes and Ambien Side Effects