Do you ever get around someone and want to gag yourself because of how disgustingly "happy" they always seem? Personally, I LOVE being around others who are cheerful and their energy is good - but ONLY if it's GENUINE. When I'm around someone who I sense is only "wearing" a smile, it really really irks me and makes me want to drop a bowling ball on their foot. Like 3 times in a row. While I'm mean-mugging them with duck lips.
Case in point, a guy friend I have. He has always wanted to be more than friends with me, but the feeling definitely isn't mutual. He always comes across polite and cheerful, but he's never been straight up with me about negative feelings he's had towards me. Not that I want someone to beef with me, but I crave authenticity in my connections. The second I feel that someone is being phony with me, I immediately begin to drift away from that person. It's almost like a hidden defense I have built up. Right or wrong, that's how I've always operated.
This is along the same issue that I have with people who preach the "HI HATER", "I LOVE MY HATERS", "HATERS ARE YOUR FANS" crap that nobody really feels deep down. This is TOTALLY the wrong type of mentality to train yourself to have. What is the point of preaching lies like this to make yourself appear strong and unaffected when you spend energy and time out of your day venting about people that fit this description? Most of us that pump blood ARE affected when someone crosses us in a negative way. And no, I'm not saying that we shouldn't boost ourselves to accept the fact that people will always have an opinion - good or bad. However, dismissing the situation on the surface just because it's cute to say in a Facebook status will not make your emotions any stronger. The only thing you're doing is showing others that you need to convince yourself you don't care. Think about it.
A large part of my 20's was spent making an effort to "save face" and not appear emotionally weak with certain people - even though in many situations you could see right through me. What I needed to learn is that by going through the conflict (which is a weak area for me), it really helps to make a bond stronger - because you are learning more about the person who you have the difference with. If there is any amount of respect (and honestly, home training) present, then all parties involved will grow from the experience.
So cut the "nobody affects me" crap. You just look like a LL Uncool J = Lame Lying Uncool JACKASS. (Yeah, I'm corny...so what.)
