Ask La Doodlebug: He Doesn't Want Our Relationship on Social Media...PERIOD.

Question from a loved READER....

"What would you say about two people who are having a growing relationship together, however, one person wants to share information about the relationship but the other wants to keep everything private?

Like, if one person wants to take pictures and post on IG, FB, or Twitter, wants to hold hands or kiss in public, wants to tell their friends about whats going on, but the other doesn't want to share any of that because they feel its simply none of their business."

MY ANSWER: 

I feel like, part of it depends upon the length and nature of the relationship.  If the two people made an exclusive commitment to one another, I find it strange that one person would be so private that they can't even show any PDA (Public Displays of Affection) to their partner.  Social media can be a touchy subject for people and everyone treats it differently, so I won't hold the privacy levels against them because it could be a comfort level type of thing.

However, this would be a sign for me (if I was in this situation) to keep my eyes open.  Not be overly suspicious or create ideas in my mind, (some people are entirely too good at that) but to just know that it could be a sign of wanting to live in two different worlds.  A person (male or female) who is living in two different worlds will always have other signs present to back up the initial sign. Most of the time, we just have to pay attention and not be in denial about things. 

For certain people, it does take time for them to transition into the mentality of being committed to another person (privately and publicly) so even if they are trying to ease into that, the best thing to do would be to try and open a dialog about it.  Communication can solve so many things when two mature adults make the effort to get on the same page.  Everyone should attempt to do this with their armor OFF, with a clear mind and an open heart.

Hope this helps some!  xoxoxoxoxo

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Zodiac ROLL CALL!!!....Who is THE ONE FOR YOU?! (#HappyHumpDay)

(YOU'RE NOT AN 80'S BABY IF YOU DON'T KNOW CHUCK WOOLERY!!!)

For the people that take themselves too seriously and think the zodiac is evil, just skip this post and come back to the next one ((rolls eyes)).

But for those who might be a little interested, I wanted to compile a list of all the signs and show what is allegedly the BEST for you and also who is the WORST.  YES...I'm speaking for the romance side.

LIKE TA' HEAR IT?!  HERE IT GOES!!!

ARIES (March 21st - April 20th)

Perfect Partners:	Leo, Sagittarius
Nearly Perfect Partners:	Gemini, Aquarius
Like Minded Souls:	Aries
Opposites You're Attracted To:	Virgo, Scorpio
Learn From Your Differences:	Pisces, Taurus
Not Your Destiny:	Cancer, Capricorn
Astrological Hell:	Libra

TAURUS (April 20th - May 20th)

Perfect Partners:	Virgo, Capricorn
Nearly Perfect Partners:	Cancer, Pisces
Like Minded Souls:	Taurus
Opposites You're Attracted To:	Libra, Sagittarius
Learn From Your Differences:	Aries, Gemini
Not Your Destiny:	Leo, Aquarius
Astrological Hell:	Scorpio

GEMINI (May 21st - June 21st)

Perfect Partners:	Libra, Aquarius
Nearly Perfect Partners:	Aries, Leo
Like Minded Souls:	Gemini
Opposites You're Attracted To:	Scorpio, Capricorn
Learn From Your Differences:	Taurus, Cancer
Not Your Destiny:	Virgo, Pisces
Astrological Hell:	Sagittarius

CANCER (Jun 22nd - Jul 23rd) Perfect Partners:	Scorpio, Pisces
Nearly Perfect Partners:	Taurus, Virgo
Like Minded Souls:	Cancer
Opposites You're Attracted To:	Sagittarius, Aquarius
Learn From Your Differences:	Gemini, Leo
Not Your Destiny:	Aries, Libra
Astrological Hell:	Capricorn

LEO (July 24th - August 23rd)

Perfect Partners:	Aries, Sagittarius
Nearly Perfect Partners:	Gemini, Libra
Like Minded Souls:	Leo
Opposites You're Attracted To:	Capricorn, Pisces
Learn From Your Differences:	Cancer, Virgo
Not Your Destiny:	Scorpio, Taurus
Astrological Hell:	Aquarius

VIRGO (Aug 24th - Sept 22nd)

Perfect Partners:	Taurus, Capricorn
Nearly Perfect Partners:	Cancer, Scorpio
Like Minded Souls:	Virgo
Opposites You're Attracted To:	Aries, Aquarius
Learn From Your Differences:	Leo, Libra
Not Your Destiny:	Gemini, Sagittarius
Astrological Hell:	Pisces

LIBRA (Sept 23rd - Oct 22nd)

Perfect Partners:	Gemini, Aquarius
Nearly Perfect Partners:	Leo, Sagittarius
Like Minded Souls:	Libra
Opposites You're Attracted To:	Taurus, Pisces
Learn From Your Differences:	Virgo, Scorpio
Not Your Destiny:	Cancer, Capricorn
Astrological Hell:	Aries

SCORPIO (Oct 23rd - Nov 22nd)

Perfect Partners:	Cancer, Pisces
Nearly Perfect Partners:	Virgo, Capricorn
Like Minded Souls:	Scorpio
Opposites You're Attracted To:	Aries, Gemini
Learn From Your Differences:	Libra, Sagittarius
Not Your Destiny:	Leo, Aquarius
Astrological Hell:	Taurus

SAGITTARIUS (Nov 23rd - Dec 20th)

Perfect Partners:	Aries, Leo
Nearly Perfect Partners:	Libra, Aquarius
Like Minded Souls:	Sagittarius
Opposites You're Attracted To:	Taurus, Cancer
Learn From Your Differences:	Scorpio, Capricorn
Not Your Destiny:	Virgo, Pisces
Astrological Hell:	Gemini

CAPRICORN (Dec 22nd - Jan 20th)

Perfect Partners:	Taurus, Virgo
Nearly Perfect Partners:	Scorpio, Pisces
Like Minded Souls:	Capricorn
Opposites You're Attracted To:	Gemini, Leo
Learn From Your Differences:	Sagittarius, Aquarius
Not Your Destiny:	Aries, Libra
Astrological Hell:	Cancer

AQUARIUS (Jan 21st - Feb 19th)

Perfect Partners:	Gemini, Libra
Nearly Perfect Partners:	Aries, Sagittarius
Like Minded Souls:	Aquarius
Opposites You're Attracted To:	Cancer, Virgo
Learn From Your Differences:	Capricorn, Pisces
Not Your Destiny:	Taurus, Scorpio
Astrological Hell:	Leo

PISCES (Feb 20th - Mar 20th)

Perfect Partners:	Cancer, Scorpio
Nearly Perfect Partners:	Taurus, Capricorn
Like Minded Souls:	Pisces
Opposites You're Attracted To:	Leo, Libra
Learn From Your Differences:	Aries, Aquarius
Not Your Destiny:	Gemini, Sagittarius
Astrological Hell:	Virgo

(Zodiac Information courtesy of CafeAstrology.com)

That's so weird...it says that Gemini and Virgos aren't for one another, but my parents are going on 33 years of marriage.  Oh welp!  LMAOOOO...

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And to Add To the Jail Love...Love And Hip Personality Bails Fiancee' out for 200k

Now that's love damn it.

So on top of Chris Breeze talking from jail to his boo boo Karreuche, it turns out that Love and Hip Hop ladybug Yandy Smith just bailed out her fiancee' Mendeecees Harris from prison for $200,000.  The judge posted bail at 600k.

Mendeecees Harris got busted back in January 2013 for his alleged involvement in a heroin and cocaine drug ring. He's been in Federal custody -- most recently in a Rochester, NY jail -- ever since his arrest. (TMZ.com)

Mendeecees is facing a sentence of about 5 to 7 years if convicted for this crime.  How far would you go as a better half to be with your loved one in this situation?  Would you pay the money even if you knew there was a chance he would be put away?

 Honestly, I know a love like that.  I do.  I ain't mad Yandy.  Love makes life worth living.

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Chris Brown Calling Karreuche from Jail: Can Love Outlast A Long Jail Sentence?

Karreuche Tran, Chris Brown's ex-girlfriend was all smiles during a call from him in prison to give a message to the fans and to also express appreciation to his former beau.  
(check out the video)

“Just calling all my fans — Letting y’all know I love yall. Thank y’all for all the support. Thank you for everything.  The new video just came out so I hope y’all enjoy that & most importantly Kae, Karrueche — I love you. So thank you”

You could tell she was happy to hear from him (the blush situation was real) but it had me thinking about incarcerated love.

At what point is "too long" when it comes to waiting for a significant other to come out of jail and remain loyal to them while they're doing their time?

I know Chris Brown is doing a very minimal sentence (one whole month) but when it comes to relationships in general, would you say the cliche' term, "the judge broke us up" applies when it comes to longer-term prison/jail time?

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LGBT Community...Help Me Understand How This Works. Who Knows Amiyah Scott the Transgender Woman?

For about a year, I've been following a woman named Amiyah Scott on Instagram.  Some of you guys might already know who she is but for those who don't, she is an infamous personality in the social media world who has been a Transgender woman (born a male and surgically changed to female) for several years now.

Here she is right here:

Like, she's gorgeous.  And honestly speaking, I was really intrigued by her because ever since I was a kid, I have never come across a transsexual who looked THAT CONVINCING AS A DAMN WOMAN.  Like....LOOK AT THIS CHICK!!!!   So on top of her constant beauty postings of hair, makeup, and clothing, her lifestyle was intriguing to me (much like her other thousands of Instagram followers.

But that isn't the reason I'm talking about her.  She recently broke up with her boyfriend that she had a very public relationship with - his name is Micah.  Micah is 20 years old while Amiyah (born Arthur) is 26.  At first, I was really confused because I was curious of Micah's sexual orientation.  He was FULLY AWARE of her sex change so would it be safe to say that he was gay?  I wasn't so sure.  Before he hooked up with Amiyah, he had tons of pics of another girl on his Instagram (the girl is actually a natural female) that passed away some time ago.  He looked pretty cozy with the girl in some of his photos (like that could have been his girl) so it made me even more confused as to whether a heterosexual man would date a transgender woman.

(Amiyah Scott pictured with ex-boyfriend, Micah)

Anywhoo...that whole question was answered after their breakup when he did an interview telling the guy who asked the questions that he identified himself as a GAY MALE.  So, okay...now I got my answer, but the thing I need help understanding (and I really want someone to explain this to me because I'm very curious about it) is why would a gay male date someone who changed himself into a female if he really wants to be with a male?  Is there a non-physical part of being gay that I am not understanding in terms of attraction and mating?  I really want to understand this one because I've always wondered that about feminine women who date "dom" women that resemble men.  If you link up with the person who looks like a guy, why wouldn't you just date a guy?  I'm not suggesting, or judging by any means.  I have a ton of people I hold very dear to my heart that are homosexual.  It's not my place to speak against someone else's private life and decisions that have nothing to do with me.  But I do want to understand, so help the kid out.

Can someone explain it to me?!

 (Amiyah with Amber Rose before the Shiny Bald persona) 

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WTF 2 Chainz?! (I went in, ya'll have to forgive me)

I was following the story of a girl who is allegedly suing rapper 2Chainz for releasing a YouTube video of her backstage called, #IsThisYourTHOT?  For people who aren't familiar with the term "THOT" (I know I lost brain cells when I initially heard this term), it means That Hoe Over There.

So apparently the story is that the girl (named Tina) snuck backstage and lied to security saying that she had been invited by Cap1 (2Chainz' friend) that she allegedly met on Instagram.

The footage shows her backstage sitting and was called over by 2Chainz to not only find out who sent for her, but to check her body out as if that would determine her likelihood of remaining back there.

WATCH THE VIDEO:



So, okay...after this video was made and was made viral via YouTube and Twitter, she decided to fight back for public humiliation.  Now, she does seem to be excited about the possibility of showing up on a blog and also shouted out her Instagram name, but clearly you can see in the video before being sent away that she didn't realize she was the butt of everyone's joke.

A second Instagram was created after all of this that Tina claims was phony because if that new instagram account was real, it definitely painted the picture of a girl who wanted publicity however she could get it.

Her original Instagram does show her in a light where she seems to be on possible groupie status, but her behavior in the video that ultimately caused this whole situation doesn't show me anything other than a girl wanting to be in the mix.

((LONG DEEP SIGH BECAUSE I'M ABOUT TO GIVE MY 85 CENTS THAT YOU MIGHT NOT AGREE WITH))

First of all damn it, I saw a lot of comments about this topic where many women were saying that girls like her are the reason why men write such degrading lyrics about females.  ((Record scratch sound))  The FU__ did you just say?!?!

Let's look at the facts: She was called over by 2Chainz and questioned about who sent for her. She complied with his request for her to turn around so they could see her body - she was CLEARLY CONFUSED AND OUTNUMBERED.  Anyone who says this chick was acting like a groupie in that video is lying because most groupies have no shame about going after someone in their radar. This chick (although probably no saint whatsoever) looked like a FAN that was happy to be backstage like anyone else would.

Who the hell wouldn't be happy to get backstage to see an artist they like?  This is my main problem though.

BLACK PEOPLE ARE THE ONLY MOFOS IN THE WORLD OF LIFE AND HUMANITY (YES I'M BEING DRAMATIC) THAT DO SHIT LIKE THIS TO ONE ANOTHER!!!

You catch rock stars and they all have groupies, but they damn sure don't make their disrespect of another person as a human being FRONT AND CENTER of their whole act.  THEN to add insult to injury, you have OTHER WOMEN backing this ignorant shit up!  How many chicks do you see stripping and bouncing their asses everyday with these monster looking creatures and you're more appauled at the FAN who probably DID get a message from one of his entourage members to come thru at the concert?!  Really???

What if she was your mom or sister?  Would it still be funny then?  Would she still be a hoe then? It's all fun and games until it becomes a person you know or better yet, YOU.  Nothing in that video showed me a chick that voluntarily wanted to be made an ass out of.  Some broad sitting down laughing in the back at this girl looking like Izma from The Emperor's New Groove.

I'm tired of black people being so divisive towards one another and pointing fingers when EVERYONE should be held accountable for their actions.  I'm not saying some women don't put themselves in a position to be talked about, but this girl right here was bullied, point blank and 2Chainz should be ashamed of himself.  He has a daughter.  What if someone did that to her and she might have just been going backstage to possibly get in the "mix"?

How many people take pics with celebs and break their damn necks to post the shit on social media?  Don't worry, I'll wait.  She probably wanted pics, wanted connections for whatever but she represents MILLIONS OF OTHER PEOPLE (MALES AND FEMALES) that would have done the same damn thing by being back there to see what would happen.

I had to go in because I don't think most Black folks understand how ignorant stuff like this is and how WE ARE OUR OWN WORST ENEMIES!!!!  What did Kevin Hart say on "Laugh At My Pain" about him and his kids...(might have been his "Seriously Funny" show) but he said, "We looked bad as a UNIT".

And that's US.  We look AWFUL as a unit because we truly hate each other.  Whether it was from early days of growing up rough, being catty towards other women, insecure that someone else will outshine, or whatever the situation, WE ARE FULFILLING THE WILLIE LYNCH THEORY PERFECTLY.  2Chainz, you are like 40 you wrinkled bastard, this girl is damn near young enough to be your child or at least your niece.

Yes, I believe I'm done now.  Now I need some more Starbucks and a damn hug.

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IF YOU HAD TO CHOOSE: Mind-blowing sex w/out True Love or Awful Sex With A Loving Mate?

Which one would you take over the other?

For some people, sex is too important on the list of needs in a relationship to not make it a priority for someone to fulfill.  For others, they don't rely on sex as a basis for fulfilling their happiness in a mate.  So, which one are you??

I feel like this could easily be a Catch 22 because on one hand, it IS POSSIBLE to improve your sex life with someone by becoming more in sync with them, but I do believe that not everyone has sexual chemistry.  Some people could melt your underroos away while another person might cause you to throw up in your mouth a little bit.  But what happens when you get older and because of physical limitations, sex may not be as front and center?

One thing that I believe society has done is made us focus MOSTLY ON SEX and INSTANT GRATIFICATION (I'm passionate about this, thus the excessive use of CAPS).  The problem (however) is that sex is temporary, much like a buzz or a high.  It doesn't last and a lot of people get into permanent situations because of temporary actions.

I believe it's necessary to understand there's balance in most things.  You should commit to a mate that excites you, someone who you are genuinely drawn to, but if the physical side of your life is covering up the fact that you wanna bust a can of pineapples upside your other half's forehead...you should already know it's time to fix that.  Whether you make the effort to come to an understanding of each others' needs or part ways, life is way too short to be miserable for the sake of having someone by your side.

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Porsha from Housewives of Atlanta is Pissed at Wendy Williams

Porsha of "Real Housewives of Atlanta" was interviewed by Atlanta's V-103 about her 
disappointment with Wendy Williams and her comments on Porsha's recent divorce.

“You know what? It’s just enough. It’s enough of women of power, women of color, not supporting each other. Like, every time I see her say something about me, I’m disappointed in her. She’s calling me ‘less than smart’; she’s less than a woman. You shouldn’t do that,” Porsha  said. “I’ve been through a very traumatic situation that hurt me. All I’m trying to do is stand and be strong and possibly inspire somebody else, and all she does is knock me down. But this is the same woman who said that I should’ve had a baby by my ex to get cash. Really? Never. Never stoop that low. So for me, I have no thoughts on Wendy, at all.” 

Wendy never builds people up in a positive way, definitely not black women.And for me, I feel like it’s low and it’s just sad,” she said. “But…she only fools the people in her audience. If you go to her Instagram and Twitter, it’s a completely different opinion. So for me I feel like her audience is just like clap-clap-clap, say ‘yeah’, say ‘yeah, stupid’, whatever. 

 I feel like with Wendy, it's never personal with her.  She's always going to catch hell because of 
her format of dishing gossip, but a story is a story to her.
She is going to gossip about Madonna just like she gossiped about Whitney.  Now I will say in the reality world arena, she doesn't seem to have much respect (overall) for certain people (flashback to her interview with Draya).

It comes with the business.  If your purpose for stardom came from being married to a high profile man, then all details (good or bad) will be front and center for discussion.  That's the contract she signed, and the nature of the entertainment beast.

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My Encounter w/ Brandy and Her Newly Ex-Fiancé

I was at the Essence Fest last year and stayed in the Old Historic French Quarter section of N'aaaalins.  So the first day I was there, I completely passed out in my room but the next day, I was rejuvenated and decided to stroll the city some before the Essence activities began.  

I went into Walgreens to buy some makeup and see all the employees in there blushing and holding their phones.  So I say to myself, well damn...I know I'm wearing one of my best fragrances (Euphoria by Calvin Klein at the time) but why the star struck faces?!  

Then I turn around to see Ms. Chardonnay Pitts RIGHT BEHIND ME picking out some eyeshadow.  And you're damn skippy I was star struck.  Damn all of you bastards who try to play it cool all the time, I grew up listening to this chick.  1994 on that ass...you DAMN RIGHT I had a moment.

This story would have held up better in court if I actually had the pic we took, but I can't find it! Anywhoo, our exchange was brief, but there were TWO THINGS I noticed off the break when I was in there.  One being that she is beautiful in person. Not that I thought she wasn't, but sometimes the in-person effect is a far cry from the images we see.  The second thing I noticed was this beautiful species of man candy she had with her, which turned out to be her other half.  

And now they've allegedly split (Ray J made comments during an interview almost confirming Brandy being back on the market).  

I have no punch line or moral to the story about this.  I just know he was fine as hell.  And yes, feel free to judge my moment of ignorance, I welcome it.

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Harrison (Black Dude from Scandal) Charged With Felony Assault?!

Columbus Short (Harrison on Scandal aka 1/5 of the Gladiators) has been getting in trouble for apparently whooping everybody's ass.

Ladies, I'm just as devastated as you are.

It seems that Mr. Short has been charged with spousal battery for fighting his wife in front of their 2 and 10 year old children.  He was also charged with child abuse because of the potential emotional trauma he may have inflicted.

THEN if that wasn't enough...look at what the heck he did to this one guy in a bar fight:

THENNNN...(I'm seriously not done) in 2010 he was prosecuted for beating down some dude at an LA basketball court.

Can we say Anger Freaking Management is in order?!  Sheesh Harrison.

How in the hell are you whooping everybody's ass like this anyway?  Aren't you like 2 feet 3 inches or something?  Ol' angry Lollipop Guild ass.  And yes, I'm going in on you for touching your wife.  Shame on you!  I would have given you the benefit of the doubt by saying she may have provoked you to step out of your zone or taken a stance like a man, but with your track record, you need Iyanla and a good tranquilizer to calm that ass down.

Doesn't he seem so chill on Scandal?!  Except when he was tapping the client's (Candice) cheeks on the show.

I just wonder if any of this will affect his work.  Damn, I'm going to look at him so different now. Sadly enough, his sex appeal for the ladybugs probably increased with this news.  I can't stand y'all.  LOL

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