Can you learn to love somebody? I hear tons of men talk about how women don't want to be with "nice guys" and that many of them end up dealing with the jerk who treats them like a second-class citizen - but what about the fact that chemistry and an attraction is needed in order to have a promising connection?
I would argue that it's pretty hard to force yourself to feel a way you naturally don't. It's almost a "catch 22" situation because what if you naturally have chemistry with a womanizer who tells the best jokes in the damn world? Or a dude who has more PMS than a woman on two birth control prescriptions but his shoulders and smile and walk makes you want to create a sex sandwich out of him? There's so many complexities when it comes to dating and relationships and honestly, it's so much easier said than done when it comes to avoiding a person that may be "bad" for you, but you are naturally drawn to that person.
So what do you do? Then there's that saying that there IS no perfect man so does that mean that some of the "bad guys" should be given a break?
Females often get a bad rap when it comes to their selection process and really, in many ways we're damned if we do and damned if we don't.
I say that because nobody seems to address the deeper issue of why so many women make poor choices when it comes to their love lives. I hear tons of ridicule about a woman who would continue to waste her life away with a "loser", but never look at the fact that many women are damaged, insecure, afraid, or uneducated about the concept of having standards. They might not have a good example to follow when it comes to self-respect and in turn, their encounters with men reflect that lack of respect.
Take me for example, my miseducation of the opposite sex began early in my teens with a very close male "best friend-like" individual who was the epitome of a womanizer teaching me what men say to get what they want. That resulted in me being overly cautious of most men and not believing what they say - I thought for the majority of my late teens AND 20s that men are just after your vagina. Although I still at about 30 years of age find that to be true in many ways, it's not true if your standards are in the right place and you require respect. But I learned that by the grace of God and after a great deal of heartbreak.
So I ask, is it a balance? Or is it just that sometimes in life you just have to compromise...ESPECIALLY IN MATTERS OF THE HEART???
